Monday, March 14, 2005
Censorship? Ignorance?
Did I ever mention that my husband is a very talented artist? Really. He's, like, really good. After we got our new furniture, he decided that the paintings hanging in the living room weren't "sophisticated" enough. We spent an evening rifling through his portfolios and picking out figure sketches. Instead of getting them custom framed, we decided to try to save some dough by picking out ready-made frames and having a mat cut. It didn't take us long to find nice black frames in our price range at Hobby Lobby. We took them to the framing counter and while Kevin was explaining what he wanted them to do, he began taking the sketches out of his portfolio. The Frame Lady's eyes got wide and offended. She touched the very corner of the paper as to not be contaminated with sin. She said that she would cut the mat for us, but would not put the product together because it was against company policy to frame nudes. I don't remember what we said. I don't think we were able to say anything. I think we just stood there gaping at her so she explained, "You see, we're a Christian store." Oh. They are a Christian store. That explains everything, right? No. That's doesn't explain anything. Kevin swore that was the last time he would ever set foot in a Hobby Lobby. I reminded him that we would have to return to get matching frames for the other sketches. He stomped his foot and said that was the second to last time he would ever set foot in a Hobby Lobby.
So the drawings look great in the living room. I foresee a problem, though. That night, we had Kevin's family over for dinner. His sister walked in and said, "Whoah, who's the naked lady?" I yelled from the kitchen, "It's not me!" Then his Dad called back, "Are you sure?" Panicked, but unable to leave the kitchen, I said, "It's not me! It's not me! It's not me!" I think this is going to happen a lot. Please. As if I would hang a nude drawing of myself for the world to see.
Later that night Colleen, Kevin's big sister, taught me how to knit. I'm cool and with it now. I'm knitting a scarf and tonight I'm going to share my knowledge with my friend, Jenny. When I was in about the fourth grade, my great grandma, Mimi, tried to teach me how to crochet. It didn't go well. In my defense, she was in her 90's and was not the best teacher. I made hot-pads to give to my sister for her wedding shower. They were terrible. They were all curled up in themselves and I had to tell her what they were. She said she liked them, though, and I was very proud. She probably doesn't even remember that. I think my scarf is going better.
Did I ever mention that my husband is a very talented artist? Really. He's, like, really good. After we got our new furniture, he decided that the paintings hanging in the living room weren't "sophisticated" enough. We spent an evening rifling through his portfolios and picking out figure sketches. Instead of getting them custom framed, we decided to try to save some dough by picking out ready-made frames and having a mat cut. It didn't take us long to find nice black frames in our price range at Hobby Lobby. We took them to the framing counter and while Kevin was explaining what he wanted them to do, he began taking the sketches out of his portfolio. The Frame Lady's eyes got wide and offended. She touched the very corner of the paper as to not be contaminated with sin. She said that she would cut the mat for us, but would not put the product together because it was against company policy to frame nudes. I don't remember what we said. I don't think we were able to say anything. I think we just stood there gaping at her so she explained, "You see, we're a Christian store." Oh. They are a Christian store. That explains everything, right? No. That's doesn't explain anything. Kevin swore that was the last time he would ever set foot in a Hobby Lobby. I reminded him that we would have to return to get matching frames for the other sketches. He stomped his foot and said that was the second to last time he would ever set foot in a Hobby Lobby.
So the drawings look great in the living room. I foresee a problem, though. That night, we had Kevin's family over for dinner. His sister walked in and said, "Whoah, who's the naked lady?" I yelled from the kitchen, "It's not me!" Then his Dad called back, "Are you sure?" Panicked, but unable to leave the kitchen, I said, "It's not me! It's not me! It's not me!" I think this is going to happen a lot. Please. As if I would hang a nude drawing of myself for the world to see.
Later that night Colleen, Kevin's big sister, taught me how to knit. I'm cool and with it now. I'm knitting a scarf and tonight I'm going to share my knowledge with my friend, Jenny. When I was in about the fourth grade, my great grandma, Mimi, tried to teach me how to crochet. It didn't go well. In my defense, she was in her 90's and was not the best teacher. I made hot-pads to give to my sister for her wedding shower. They were terrible. They were all curled up in themselves and I had to tell her what they were. She said she liked them, though, and I was very proud. She probably doesn't even remember that. I think my scarf is going better.
